The doctors is in! Except, instead of a doctor, it’s a cartoon dog that doesn’t know what he’s talking about. But never fear, you came here for some crappy advice, so that is what I will impart!

Without further ado, the first question on the inaugural column:

Hello Cartoon Dog,

I'm a clinician and lecturer during the day time. I've always wanted to become an Opera singer because I can sing. I started doing work shops and teaching myself Opera around probably around 9 years ago. Then my midlife crises kicked in, you know that one where you say to yourself 'Golly gosh, I haven't done this yet and it needs to be done. 2021 and 2022 I've done professional opera training with this guy that moved to our city (professional voice coach and tenor) and I've developed this voice and I know all these arias but I have nowhere to go.

I'm following Web. 3 and NFT's closely (especially music) to see how that can apply to me (how I can get my work out on Web. 3) but I have NO CLUE where to start. Maybe the Cartoon Dog has some advice? Any advice will be greatly appreciated!

Sincerely,
Aria Stark

Dear Aria,

First of all, how cool that you started singing opera while still doing your day job! Taking steps to chase your dreams is all sorts of badass. As someone who has generally only dabbed his toes in his dreams, it takes a lot of bravery and gumption to really go for it. Good for you, earnestly!

In terms of my actual advice, though, there will be a general theme - and it is this:

Keep your expectations low.

Now I know very little about the music / music performance industry, other than that it’s quite difficult to break into it, and like most things, it’s a lot about networking and grinding. But it all really depends on your goals. Do you want to do some smaller scale performances? If, say, you’re part of a church, perhaps you could arrange something with them. Do you want to become world famous? Well, that’s when you want to look at the picture and keep your expectations low.

But for most things like this, keep your eyes and ears open for opportunities and/or try to make your own, through your own network or by expanding it.

These days, though, there’s an immense amount of ways to try to “do it yourself” in terms of fame - as in, if you’re willing to put yourself out there or do something creative, there are opportunities abound! Again, it all depends on what you want to accomplish. For example:

• You could start a Twitch stream where you perform various things for a live audience

• You could start a fiverr and do specific paid requests for people

• You could start a YouTube channel and perform some of your favorite songs for the world to discover

There are also opportunities depending on your general interests - let’s say you love video games and would enjoy being part of a soundtrack for that - there may be a handful of indie musicians looking for someone who can sing opera for a track they want to make. These are unlikely to be easy or lucrative, and would take expanding your network to those circles, but if your expectations are properly placed, any gig would probably be exciting!

What about web3 and NFTs?

Now, you did ask about web3 and NFTs related to this kind of thing. Here are my general thoughts on that:

• Web3 is mostly just useless hype

An NFT is simply some data on a blockchain that a wallet can virtually own. The actual art / music / etc. isn’t stored on the blockchain but via some other service, usually IPFS, that the NFT data points to. You can think of NFT ownership as something similar to receipt.

Can you make money selling your music as an NFT? Probably not. The people who make money selling their NFTs are either already famous or made a name from themselves within the scene, and thus their NFTs are thought more of as collector’s items. In terms of the rest of web3 culture, well, it’s basically just rich kids playing clout games. I wouldn’t recommend it for a normal, well-adjusted person.

This video by @TheBaphie on Twitter explains the culture pretty well:

So my general advice here is, unless you want to subject yourself to all of that, it’s probably better to try to make a name for yourself in another way. But, if you really really want to still, it’ll be a grind like everything else, with the supply heavily exceeding the demand, trying to build your platform and stand out among everything else. Here’s an article with a bunch of hype and buzzwords about it. You can set up a metamask wallet and upload an mp3 you record to opensea if you want to create a music NFT the easy way. Then you gotta figure out some platform to advertise it, like Twitter.

But, y’know, if you go that route... Keep your expectations low.

Want some specific crappy advice from a cartoon dog? Leave me a comment or send an email to billym2k@substack.com, if you are a paying subscriber. Keep in mind that anything sent gives implicit permission for publication, but I’ll of course not include your name or email address in the article (I’ll make up a name for you and potentially edit a bit for clarity).

Hi folks! I am starting a new section as part of this substack called “Crappy Advice From a Cartoon Dog.”

At first, I’ll be limiting who can send me questions to paid subscribers, who can send me an email with their query (billym2k@substack.com). Keep in mind that anything sent gives implicit…

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